Is life not interesting? I mean, Wow. Things in the world have gone cuckoo! Not that I give these things focus because I just do not. However I give my awareness to my life, to my heart, and to my mind. Plus I pray, or send love to areas that need it. I have often written about intentional denial, that is what I still believe, as without, so within, or visa versa.
What I am learning is how much I can grow, and learn, and change. At my age I am still observing how much editing needs to be done on me. That is cool. I am finally learning how to catch ego at its business and deal with it faster. I will give you an example of what I mean; I did not receive a scholarship from the teaching college, I was hurt, and I was angry, and I took it like a three year old. However, I discussed it with wise women who helped me to understand and move past it, it took a good five days (I must reduce that time).
So this was the first week of school. I had my schedule set, I had my textbooks, ready set go. Then scary English professor, I mean scary, she assigned homework last Thursday for midnight the first day of school (who does that). The content was brutal and violent. I am not going to name it as this is public. I thought I could do it. As I read the novel I had to keep my hand on my solar plexus. I was becoming super stressed feeling all my attention would be diverted from my other five classes to meet the demands from this professor. Here’s the thing; I did not do my due diligence, I did not look up the professor or the class for reviews. Always, always, do that! I got so stressed I got a cold, and for what? For no reason whatsoever. I dropped that class and now I will be analyzing Fairy Tales. Yes, of course. I put myself through all of that. When will I ever learn? lol Well, I am working on it.