Down The Rabbit Hole


Ah Summer, and too much time on one’s hands. I mentioned in an earlier post that I was reading Shelley’s, Frankenstein, although brilliant, dark, and depressing are its mood, I put it down. It really was not putting my consciousness in the creative mind frame I feel necessary at this time. I am about halfway through it, but Victor’s utter lack of manning up, really doesn’t make me cheer for the protagonist. I look forward to finish reading it another time. So other than dealing with the constant needs directed toward attending ASU in the Fall, which is rapidly approaching, and requiring a tenacity to endure certain tribulations related to continuing my path. I must just release it.

Speaking of releasing! Whoa, things have come up from depths in me that I didn’t even realize were there. Has this sort of clearing been going on with any of you? But it is amazing, like in reading Frankenstein I understood all the literary references, whereas once I would not. Now having wisdom, as these issues come up from the depths, they float lightly before me, and I observe them, and then release them and they dissipate. I digress having not yet referenced the post title, Down The Rabbit Hole, so either from boredom, or escapism, as not to deal with complicated ASU  Resident Petition, I indulge in reading articles, and watching YouTube videos. Actually I always do that. lol One thing usually leads to another. I am still just obsessed with Michael Stipe, and the Losing My Religion, video. Then I faintly remembered my baby sister being at the video shoot, which just continued that conversation. I noticed the reference in the video to Gabriel Garcia Marquez, story, The Very Old Man With Enormous Wings, which I swear I wrote about here, but I cannot find where. Anyway that is a great story, I linked the pdf above.

I have comfort DVD’s that go with comfort food like ice cream. I doubt that it is any surprise that I am a SciFi freak, so I have been watching my full series dvd’s of Farscape.  Space shows always comfort me, which is odd, like Star Trek TNG, was like family, I cried when it was cancelled. So my ethereal space myth is my psychological ice cream, or Little Debbie Swiss Roll snack cakes.

So I indulge myself in attempting understanding articles on quantum psychics, channeled messages to hopefully inspire hope, and the curious conspiracies. I shared a post on Facebook that was titled, “Earth taken by the Hubble Telescope” sometimes I am naive, as it was a composite image, a friend scoffed that the Hubble was missing. I thought that is odd, she is out of her mind. So yesterday I approached the rabbit hole via watching this video, Hubble Tracks Bright Auroras on Jupiter, which was followed by this video, Flat Earth: Graduate Finds Out the Hubble Doesn’t Exist, (long and a it boring, but I listened threw,) and concluding with this one, Don’t Believe in Flat Earth Theory? This Might Change Your Mind. As the video maker comments, even conspiracy theorist laugh at this one, yet I watched for two hours, after I had delayed the watching by two hours to watch a documentary on Stanley Kubrick, called Room 237, this was . . . fascinating at the least, considering a couple of months ago I saw a video  (Has Vanished) of Kubrick two days before he died confessing that he shoot the moon landing here in a studio. Snopes says it is a fake, and so does Kubrick’s wife but…… None of this was shocking but the guy with the Flat Earth theory video??? It is as intriguing as a crazy sounding conspiracy can get. These ideas find there way into popular culture, as the wall of ice said by Admiral Byrd at the edge of the Earth is also echoed in the smash HBO, series, Game of Thrones, has a wall:

The Wall is a colossal fortification which stretches for 100 leagues (300 miles) along the northern border of the Seven Kingdoms, defending the realm from the wildlings who live beyond. The Wall is reported to be over 700 feet tall and is made of solid ice. It was supposedly constructed using both magic and mundane means some eight millennia ago, in the aftermath of the Long Night to defend the realm against the White Walkers who apparently dwell in the far north, though they are now considered myths by most.

If you are so inclined to watch the 2 hour long theory, you would see the similarities. It bent my mind platform I must admit.

Since I have spent my adult life seeking the answers to the philosophical questions, “Who am I?, What am I? What is existence?”, and so on, I attempt to remain open. Not long ago I saw business man Elon Musk site his theory that, The Chance We Are Not living in a computer simulation is one in billions. ??? It is possible.

In that are we in a Matrix, look at binary code, what do we see? 011100100 011100100, hmm 11/11 phenomena maybe? Or perhaps we live under a dome on a Flat Earth, like a lab experiment, or we are some sweet creatures of a jealous god, or some haphazard chemistry that evolved? Everybody has an opinion or a belief, one way or another. I will continue being entertained, and curious about existence, and its theories. For now it is back to my Farscape, marathon, and ice cream.

Happy Christmas/Brumalia/Saturnalia

Ch deer left

Ch deer strp3

Ch deer strip

Ch deer right

So This Is Christmas

I hope everyone is having a loving Yuletide Holiday, and if not, I am sending you love, and big hugs, and smiles at your heart. I appreciate you all so, so very much. Know that I am thinking of you all with the most happy wishes of joy, good health, and abundance! Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Festive Saturnalia, and Happy New Year to us All ❤

I want to share an excerpt from my essay, “Sir Gawain and The Green Knight,” I wrote it last December at the end of Fall semester, it talks about the synthesis of Pagan, and Christian holidays, since the story takes place at Yuletide.

The birth of a ‘Christ’ Child lies at the heart of the traditional Christmas story, which has been celebrated since the third century A. D. Such a story also lies at the heart of Pagan myth where rituals dedicated to birth flourish.  The seasonally based time of the year traditionally given over to Christmas also coincides with the winter solstice known as Brumalia, and falls similarly to the birth date Solarus, the Roman Sun God. In addition to Solarus, the Romans celebrated the pagan festival of Saturnalia dedicated to Saturn the God of Agriculture.  Interestingly, the use of evergreens and laurel in the holiday’s celebratory decorations were perceived symbolic of eternal life, as the leaves do not die in winter. As Christianity expanded to become the official religion of the Roman Empire, further Pagan holidays were subsumed or subordinated within the framework of a Christian world-view.

 Essay link

The stag is an animal that is also in the poem, of Sir Gawain, and has interesting symbolism. Here is an excerpt from, The Element Encyclopedia of Secret Signs and Symbols, (I am going to paraphrase…)

The horns of the stag lend it an especial significance as a magical and sacred animal, the horns also represent a masculine fertility symbol. (Which is interesting with the strong feminine goddess energy with this Christmas full moon.)  Giving rise to the word “horny” (that’s from the book.)  There are also associations with the pagan god, Pan. It is all about the horns. The stag was also Harry Potter’s patronus! Hmmm?

Here is a Christian view of stag symbolism:

The stag is a symbol for Christ, Who tramples and destroys the Devil. Early bestiaries describe the stag as a relentless enemy of snakes. The stag was believed to pursue snakes into their holes or rock crevices, flushing them out by flooding the hole with the breath or water from its mouth, and devouring them.

Because the snake is a symbol of Satan, the stag’s war against them made the stag a symbol of Christ and the Catholic in his battle against the evil one. The water used to flush out snakes became symbolic of Christ’s wisdom and purity, the Gospel, and the water that flowed from His pierced Side on the Cross.


Once again, I wish you all a very Happy Holiday Season, and I am sending you all love and gratitude for being part of my life.



Black Butterfly


Back To Black

The art is a little dark looking but the post regards my totem for the day, yep, a black butterfly. I was certain I looked this up last year when I saw one? lol I found a great article on the meaning.

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Black Butterfly Meaning

By Rutuja Jathar

The black butterfly meaning and symbolism changes from one culture to the other. In all, it is somewhat similar to the meaning of black color.

Morning light, silken dream to flight
As the darkness gave way to dawn
You’ve survived, now your moment has arrived
Now your dream has finally been born

Black Butterfly, sailed across the waters
tell your sons and daughters
what the struggle brings
Black Butterfly, set the skies on fire
rise up even higher
so the ageless winds of time can catch your wings…

Most of you must have heard this beautiful song by Deniece Williams. The above mentioned verse itself explains a lot about the symbolism and meaning which can be related with black butterflies. As we know, all the types of tiny and beautifully colored butterflies have always been associated with grace, elegance and beauty. Naturally, butterflies are used for symbolizing femininity, style and charm.

On the other hand, the black color is associated with numerous human emotions and qualities that are often overpowering. These qualities are – power, authority, sexuality, mystery, sophistication, elegance, style, anger, fear, unhappiness, evil, depth, sadness, death, mourning, remorse and the unknown. I think, the same symbolism of black color is likely to have been linked up with butterflies; which created the theory of black butterfly meaning. Nevertheless, the symbolism and the constructs that are related with black butterflies, have alluded many of us, at least once. So, now is the time to find out what black butterfly actually means in different cultures.

Symbolism and Meaning of Black Butterfly

As far as lepidopterology (a scientific branch that studies butterflies and moths) is concerned; the black and deep colors of butterflies are a result of the melanin color pigments present in them. Let’s look into the symbolism of black butterfly.

Metamorphosis: In many cultures, it is believed that black butterflies are the symbol of transition, renewal or rebirth. It is also believed that black butterflies could be a symbol of rebirth of something or people. They are also symbolized for longevity and shift in the power. In short, black butterflies are supposed to be the sign of positive change in the present situation.

Death Warning: In various parts of the world including Central America, Philippines, China, black butterflies are considered as a symbol of death. Hence, according to these people, a black butterfly or moth in the house is the warning of death of a member of the house. They also appear in the house when someone in the house has already died.

Dead Souls: According to the fascinating (and a bit scary) lores of the land of the Celts or Ireland, black butterflies are nothing but souls of the deceased people. According to Irish people, when deceased people fail to discover their Afterlife, they turn into a black butterfly. Hence, these butterflies can enter the house or properties where they once belonged as a living soul.

Witch Camouflage: The infamous witches are also associated while explaining the meaning of a black butterfly. According to the folklores, witches transform themselves into black butterflies so that nobody can recognizes them while stealing various foods that they need to eat! This is especially evident with reference to black butterflies or moths that appear in or around the houses at night.

Fire Goddess: According to Aztec mythology, Obsidian Butterfly or Itzpapalotl was the warrior goddess of fire and infant mortality. In historic documents, Itzpapalotl is associated with moths, deer and black butterfly. She is described as the star demon who devours people during solar eclipse. According to iconography, she camouflages in the forms of various creatures and insects so as to stay unrecognizable.

Positive Symbolism: No matter whether you believe in the black butterfly symbolism or don’t; you can still take out a few positive meanings from the aforementioned butterfly symbolism. At least that is what most of the people do while getting butterfly tattoos. You see, in most of the stories, black butterfly is associated with change, transition, freedom and rebirth. It is symbolized as death – assume it as the death of all the bad things and misfortunes!

All these things are both mythical and real. Mythical – if you want to take them in the negative manner; and real – if you want to take them in a positive manner.


Sacred Feathers


Well it will be interesting to see how this feather thing pans out. I bought a new book on symbols at the bookstore, The Element Encyclopedia of Secret Signs and Symbols. So, I decide to read on feathers. Here is an excerpt of the entry.

The symbolism of feathers is closely aligned to that of wings and birds. They stand for ascendance, flight, communication with the spirit realms and the element of air. Shamanistic use of feathers is for all these reasons; the feathers enable the soul to become as light as the feather and transcend the boundaries of gravity, time, and space. Shamans of all nationalities wear feathers as a part of their ritual apparel.

The eagle feather is the most valuable of all feathers. In some parts of the world, this feather, synonymous with all the power of the bird, is considered so sacred that only card-carrying Native American tribal members may own them. Eagle feathers that are found in the wrong hands are the cause of heavy fines.

This is a fact. I googled it. It is called ,The Eagle Feather Law. Wikipedia says,

The eagle feather law provides many exceptions to federal wildlife laws regarding eagles and other migratory birds to enable American Indians to continue their traditional practices.

Under the current language of the eagle feather law, individuals of certifiable American Indian ancestry enrolled in a federally recognized tribe are legally authorized to obtain eagle feathers. Unauthorized persons found with an eagle or its parts in their possession can be fined up to $25,000. The eagle feather law allows for individuals who are adopted members of federally recognized tribes to obtain eagle feathers and eagle feather permits.

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So until I am adopted by a recognized tribe, no feather. The Native American man I spoke to must have thought I was crazy. lol

I am part Cherokee but…I am from the Lost Tribe and We are not Federally Recognized. The Lost Tribe fell out from the Trail of Tears staying in Oklahoma and did not get on the Dawes Roll. I feel certain this symbolism that is so resonant with me has some reason but……

Native American Chant




A brief but important detour from Gatsby. Unless you have been under a rock you are aware of comet ISON and it’s big sling around the Sun tomorrow on Thanksgiving. I read in one article that comet ISON could be the brightest thing in the sky since the birth of Christ.

It certainly feels to me like a huge herald of change. Now that may seen superstitious to a scientific mind, but I am of a symbolic mind, so to me it is a huge sign. Some have called it Worwood from the Bible, some have called it Nibiru, but I call it ISON. I was telling my sister, how very interesting I found its name to be, and that I am sure it was an anagram, which it is, but to me, there are no coincidences.

Credit for Comet ISON’s name goes to its discovers: Vitali Nevski and Artyom Novinchonok. It bears the name of their night-sky survey program, the International Scientific Optical Network. ISON is a group of observatories in ten countries which have organized to detect, monitor, and track objects in space. Source

I SON~ Interesting as so many say now is the time of the return of Christ. I am not a firm believer of things from a Biblical point of view, but a return of Christ Consciousness, A new age, I am all for that. Whatever it means, which could be nothing, it means something to me. I feel change, positive and good. I am excited to continue my venture as an Earth human, and excited to see us transform into more loving beings.

Can’t wait to see if ISON beats its odds against that giant star, our life giving Sun.

***************************ISON UPDATE TO THE UPDATE:

STOCKHOLM (AP) — A comet that gained an earthly following because of its bright tail visible from space was initially declared dead after essentially grazing the sun. Now, there is a sliver of hope that Comet ISON may have survived.

*************ISON UPDATE:

Despite there being great hope for Comet ISON, it appears it disappeared behind the Sun today never to emerge again. Comet ISON has been destroyed by the intense heat and activity of our star, the Sun.
Thanks for being a visitor to

Let there be peace on Earth and let it begin with me.


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The Blue Butterfly

While I am on the subject of elementals and symbolism, I thought to explain the blog name bluebutterfiesandme.

In many talks with my dear friend, I kept seeing images and visions of blue butterflies. I started collecting images of blue butterflies, and I thought they were to mean something to her. However she said that she thought they regarded me.

About this time, for reasons uncertain to me, my friend stops talking to me. Which is what my pity party friendship post was about to a large degree. Anyway I digress, this is when I started blogging. My intention was just to see if I could make a blog and I had no idea that others would see it, and read it. I was just playing and experimenting. So when I had to pick a name blue butterflies was on my mind. Of course that was taken, so I added the and me part.

I wanted to talk about what I have spent my life studying which were things of a spiritual nature.

Viola there you have it. Blue Butterflies and it was vision driven.

Oh my friend posted this picture on my facebook.


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